Monday, May 26, 2014

Andi finds out that alcohol is not conducive to this process

Week 2

The guys are LOVING the place that they are staying in.
Chris Harrison says that Andi is one of the best they have ever had on the show…interesting…hope the past contestants didn’t hear you. He explains the standard rules that they should all know by now. He also brings the first date card.  The main thing I have learned from this is that Chris Harrison looks really good in purple.

The first date card: of course-it’s Angel Eric.  This episode is going to be PAINFUL.
Dylan isn’t happy about this…and he also has the creepy bad guy greasy curl going on.  Also, anyone who says anything bad about Angel Eric is going to feel like a total jerk when they re-watch this. 

They built a sandcastle and flew a kite.  AND THEN A CHOPPER CAME.  So this makes our first chopper of the season.  We’ll keep track to see if it will reign supreme or if private concerts will still be the go-to for the surprises.  They land on the top of the mountain.  The first thing Angel Eric does is give Andi his sweatshirt which is super sweet.  They are going to snowboard.  Apparently Andi is not talented in this front. Angel Eric has some skill and he is excited to teach her how.  They end the date by spending the evening in a cabin. Shocker! Dead guy gets a rose. 

Soooo the group date…..the guys are going to be stripping “for charity.”  Good heavens, this is ridiculous.  The only comical part is the firefighter who got assigned to the firefighters group.  It led to a lot of jokes like “do you wear this at work too?” And that is all I have to say about this portion of the date.  It was ridiculous and too much.  It should not have happened.  None of their dates with stripping should ever happen.

I can’t tell if Cody, male Vienna, is more excited about the house they are in or about Andi being there.  Craig wants to drink-now.  Brian is very passionate about teaching.  He said that he was super nervous but that he danced because it was for a good cause….eeeeeehhhhh.  I’m not so sure about that and I’m not sure that his bosses would be okay with this either.  Andi also hit it off with Josh.  Craig is having trouble with the stripping.  He is compensating with the awkwardness of the dancing by drinking a lot.  He kept asking for shots and said “this is about to get real!”…yeah, real stupid. Sober Charlie Sheen is singing for Andi.  Meanwhile Craig, who is super trashed, is looking for Andi.  However, it is leading to some pretty funny comments about cut off points and drinking too much.  Oh no! He keeps taking shots! The guys are trying to look out for him.  They at least pointed him in the direction of the deep end of the pool before he jumped.  One of the guys is swimming with him so that he doesn't get hurt.  Wow.  They even brought producers in to calm him down.  Oh good.  Andi is questioning everything because one person got drunk.  One.  And this means that now she doesn't know why they are all here.  Marcus steps in and calms her down and wins himself the rose. 

Chris the farmer has the second one-on-one.  Andi is excited for this and is dressed in her 40s glam.  She thankfully has a change of clothes for Chris because he came in shorts and a polo.  They are going to a horse race.  They talk to an old couple who have been together 55 years.  They are precious…and probably planted by ABC…. They spend the entire day at the track and have the place to themselves that night.  He tells her about his previous engagement and that Andi was the girl he was hoping for.  She is super encouraged and gives him a rose.  AND THERE IS A SURPRISE! WHAT COULD IT BE??? A concert. This leaves us with choppers and private concerts tied for this week.  BUT WAIT! Chris gets the first kiss of the season! Which leads to a straight up make-out session.  I wonder if he will be Andi’s Arie…

Cocktail Party

Andi is wearing a disco ball for a dress.  And her theme for this week is “NO SETTLING” and her overuse of the phrase “oh stawp!” is going to make me smack someone.  Marquel is wearing too many patterns.  But he is so fine.  If only he would have brought cookies again.  Andi thinks that all of the guys are stepping it up tonight.  She just realized that “I am really starting to get to know these guys!” This is ridiculous.  Josh M. is a mess tonight.  He rambled and touched her face in a weird way.  He asked for more time because he is having problems.  Somehow they start dancing and then kissing.  Maybe this is the key: spin Andi around and she gives a kiss. Hahahah Craig sang Andi a song for messing up and getting drunk.  It was hysterical, especially because of the group of guys that snuck over to the window to hear it. 

Rose Ceremony

Angel Eric, Marcus, and Chris all have roses from their respective dates.
Chris Harrison introduces our walking disco ball to dispense the remaining roses.  Ron gets the first rose.  Dylan gets a rose. Bill Nye’s son gets a rose…cause making pants is still impressive.  Marquel gets a rose.  Andrew gets a rose.  So one half of the bromance is safe.  Tasos gets a rose.  Josh gets a rose, which isn't surprising since he’s one of the two guys she made out with.  EW! Male Vienna got a rose.  Nick V. gets a rose.  Patrick gets a rose- the bromance is safe! Brian gets a rose.  And the hairdresser gets a rose. And clean Charlie Sheen gets the final rose.

Carl, the firefighter, went home.  As did Nick S. and Craig.  Nick S. was collateral damage from helping Craig while he was drunk and in the pool. 


The guys are going to sing with Boys II Men, playing basketball, someone is going to be accused of being here for the wrong reasons.  Andi is going to ugly cry? And she will definitely give a lecture on taking things seriously.

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