Sunday, June 1, 2014

There is a Storm Brewing

Week 3, Part 1

Chris Harrison surprises the guys and tells them that they get to join Andi in Santa Barbara.  Santa Barbara should probably sue ABC for damages because the lack of enthusiasm from the guys has definitely convinced me to never go there.  Andi picks Nick for the first one-on-one in Santa B.  He was shockingly realistic about this process which just strikes me as funny.  He says that she is a beautiful girl and he’ll see if it’s worth sticking around.  I applaud this man! No desperation and a clear head on his shoulders! Snatch that man up.  But of course, the guys think that he isn't being “real.” 
Personally, I find the cameras that are mounted on their bikes weird.  They are at unflattering angles.  Andi should have had a say in their placement-girls care about things like that...Nick is having a really good time on the date…but it makes me wonder what trouble is brewing in the house.  Wow.  He is even being honest about how he is slightly skeptical and how he struggles with being unsure of where he stands.  They have an adorable and open conversation.  I may not hate watching them…interesting.  Unfortunately, my sister just pointed out that Nick has a slight lisp.  AND IT CAN’T BE UNHEARD!
What is Nick’s jacket?!?! Are you a sleuth? Do you work for Scruff McGruff from Chicago Illinois 60652?

 But Andi’s earrings are quite cool.  Andi has handled all of the guys who have said they had previous engagements really well.  Seriously girl, kudos. Andi likes the way that Nick views things and she gives him the rose. Aaaannnnd they make out on top of a clock tower.  He is guy number 3 to get kisses.  But the first one to not start kissing after dancing…

Group date guys are Brian, Marquel, Male Vienna, Tasos, Brett, Ron, Sober Charlie Sheen, Josh, Angel Erick, Drew, Patrick, and Marcus. Andi takes the guys to a classical musical studio.  Once they get inside they see Boys II Men standing there.  The guys FREAK out-Marquel particularly.  He’s doing a bit of fangirling.  Sober Charlie Sheen needs to cut it out.  He is annoying.  But the Josh's impressions of his opera singing are hilarious.  Best part of this entire thing is how the members of Boys II Men make fun of how horrible everyone is at singing.  SOBER CHARLIE SHEEN NEEDS TO SHUT HIS FACE. Your incessant bragging makes me want to punch you and also applaud the guys for not smacking that smug look off your face.  Apparently Tasos is the only other one who can sing.  Marquel is bringing his swagger though.  The guys are so ‘shocked’ and ‘appalled’ that they are not only practicing with Boys II Men but that they are also singing in concert with them.  Paaahleeezee.  This happens every year.  Marquel is still freaking out which is adorable.  Male Vienna is also freaking out, but it is less adorable.  Best part of the concert is the little girl in the crowd who firmly planted her hands on her ears.  Boys II Men said that if this is any indication of who she should pick Andi should be alone.  Hahaha that’s wonderful. 
Andi pulls a strange prank on Male Vienna.  She pretends that the other guys have told her that he was a girlfriend.  He handled it well, but that’s all that they showed.  It was interesting.  AW Angel Eric was insecure.  Marcus is going for the first kiss and he gets it.  Do you know that you are number 4? Ohho ho, but Josh also gets to make out with Andi.  They actually seem more like a couple.  Josh got the rose.  Marcus looks crushed…and yet I wonder how Sober Charlie Sheen will take it… Marcus doesn't think their connection is as good as the one he has with Andi.  It's almost adorable how  naive he is...
 Stop ruining the Boys II Men song!
JJ has the next one-on-one.  Oh goodness gracious his pants.  I'm sure he made them.  They are going to be made over into old people.  When they see each other they just start laughing.  JJ goes off about how she looks way better when she’s old than he does.  Andi keeps saying that this is what it feels like to grow old with someone.  No! No its not! Having makeup done for a couple of hours does not equate to spending your life with someone! That’s just stupid.  But at least JJ isn't saying amazingly stupid things. He can say with confidence that he is falling for her regardless of her looks. He was also really precious when he said that if this is what she would look like in 50 years, sign him up!

Ron had to leave the show because of a death of a close friend. 

I always find it massively interesting how people don’t actually listen to what the other person is saying.  JJ is talking about how he is unique enough that he doesn't know if he can find a girl like her who will accept him as he is.  He didn't say anything about shying away from who he is or changing…just how he didn't know if a girl like her would want a guy like him.  Yet, that is how Andi took it--as him shying away from himself.  She said his uniqueness is what drew her to him…but let’s be real honey, you are not going to pick him.  Let him go before he gets super attached.  …does she listen at all? 

Cocktail Party

Andi is telling the guys that she feels for Ron and that she genuinely cares about each of them.  She said that she wanted to enjoy the time she had with everyone. Yet…somehow it seems like she wasn't saying anything.

Hahaha.  Angel Eric got totally blocked by Nick sending Andi flowers.  He had a thoughtful note that made Andi smile the entire time she read it.  It completely through off Angel Eric and won Nick some serious alone time. 

JJ decides to wear crazy pants and to talk to Josh about how Andrew got a girl’s number on the last group date.  I really hope they decide to bring this to Andi’s attention before the rose ceremony.  It would be so great to just blow the roof off this place with drama.  JJ’s pants are sooo distracting.  I don’t know whether to stare at the pants to listen to the drama.  What is that psychedelic pattern? Why on earth does it exist?  Triple J (JJ & Josh) confront Andrew.  He walks away and crazy pants JJ follows him and keeps talking.  SO naturally the cameras follow too. 

Marcus pulls Andi aside to remind her that he thinks about her even when she’s not around.  Oh no, he thinks that he is the only one with a connection with her…nope.  Son, you are not going to last long.  Excellent! Andrew is now ready for the warpath.  It became a simple shouting match that delivered- someone was called a “grown ass man!”

Rose Ceremony

Nick, JJ, and Josh have roses.  Marcus gets a rose.  Brian gets a rose-go basketball coach! Marquel gets a rose.  That man has a devilish grin.  Tasos gets a rose.  So far, I am in full support of her choices.  Man Vienna gets a rose.  Patrick gets a rose.  I literally know NOTHING about him.  Who are you? Chris gets a rose! Yay farmer! Angel Eric gets a rose—but let’s be real, she owned him after that flower stunt Nick pulled.  Dylan got a rose.  Andrew got the final rose, naturally.  Any drama automatically equals safety for at least one more week. 
Thank the Lord that Sober Charlie Sheen is leaving.  Brett the hairstylist is also going home. 
Best part of the night: the singing bloopers :)

Tomorrow night is going to be ridiculous.
Side Note
Nick has reminded me of some actor for a while and I finally figured out who! 
Nick 
Peter MacNicol

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